How To See Nashville With A 2-Year-Old

I love me some Dukes of Hazzard, so you can imagine my delight to see this Cooter’s outlet just down the street from our hotel. Abby did not share my excitement at getting my picture taken with the General Lee.

Touristing in Nashville pretty much means you’re going to see a lot of sights related to country music. First stop was the Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum. It mostly consists of glass cases filled with old musical instruments and hideous besequined costumes.

It took Abby about 18 seconds to become bored. She held out longer than I thought she would.

The museum also is home to some other hideous examples of country showbiz excess. Like this 1962 Bonneville once owned by Webb Pierce. It features saddle-leather upholstery and an actual horse saddle for a center console. The door handles are made of old-time revolvers. And silver dollars cover most of the inside surfaces.

This Cadillac limo (said to be a favorite of Elvis’) sports gold-plated door handles and the exterior paint included diamond dust and fish scales to give it that shine.

A long time ago, I was a country music devotee. (I recently blogged of my love for the musical stylings of Waylon Jennings.) So I was familiar with a lot of the history and artifacts housed in the museum. I had all my radio presets on country stations. For a time I refused to even listen to other types of music. That all ended one night in 1991 when I realized country radio and the mainstream country music industry had changed and was strictly intended for 40-year-old women and teenage girls. I couldn’t take any more songs about how dudes loved their wives and how proud they were of the American flag. It got boring. So I branched out into other music and discovered the country music I liked had become alt-country or Americana music. Remember, this was 1991 and I lived in rural Kansas, so there weren’t any radio stations playing alt-country or Americana. I started listening to a rock station out of Joplin, Mo., that bragged they only played music from CDs.

I used to watch Hee-Haw, so I enjoyed this display of the korn field set where the TV rubes would tell corny jokes and the guest stars would stand and shout out the names and population of their hometowns.

The museum set aside one big room as a tribute to the various Hank Williamses. This case was in the Hank Williams III area. All my Northwest Arkansas homies should note the Pea Ridge Mule Jump ball cap. Hank III named his rock band Assjack in tribute to somebody’s mule jumping prowess.

I did mention my regard for the musical stylings of the late Waylon Jennings, didn’t I?

A short walk through downtown brought us to the Ryman Auditorium, a great 100-year-old-plus performance hall that was home to the Grand Ole Opry until 1974.

Still bored from the the Hall of Fame, Abby didn’t alter her perspective at the Ryman.

The old box office now serves as a recording studio. As you can see, there was someone recording during our visit.

Due to my aforementioned previous country music fandom, I know that a lot of ghosts haunt this alley on the side of the Ryman. Performers used to cross the alley to Tootsie’s Orchid Lounge to smoke and swap stories and pick a little. Apparently a lot them used drink and take pills and have some extramarital fun there, also. The Ryman museum displays don’t mention that stuff though. I’m sure there’s something inside Tootsie’s that explains its place in Opry history. I didn’t get to go in because Abby’s still underage and I didn’t want to split up the group. Tootsie’s is also famous as the place to see musicians before they become big stars. There are many such places in Nashville, but they were off-limits to us on this trip due to the Abby factor.

Later we headed to the Loveless Cafe outside Nashville on the recommendation of my sister Katie. The place is famous so it was naturally packed. I shot a lot of photos because we had plenty of time to kill.

I set my sights on the daily special: prime rib. Yum.

Several buildings housing craft-selling shops surround the restaurant proper. These weird cutout figures are all over the property.

The Loveless is one of those places with autographed photos of celebrities all over the walls. Even TV’s Punky Brewster.

Gina and I ended up splitting a two cheeseburger extra value meal at McDonald’s. Abby had a chicken McNugget Happy Meal. See what I did there? Pulled the ol’ switcharoo. Didn’t see it coming did you? Our initial 30 minute wait at the Loveless turned into 50 minutes with the assurance that it would only be 20 minutes more. Too much for Abby, who had been bored for about 10 hours without relief. So we booked it back to the McDonald’s across the street from our hotel.